Before you know it, you're the crazy cat lady in the scary house

Ugh. Nastylittletrollmen.

March 25, 2003 ... 5:21 p.m.

Ugh. Nastylittletrollmen.

[checking out new school photos]
Le Prince: �Wow. I'm cute!�

I have, officially, drunk (is that right? like I care) enough Mt. Dew to get three jerseys. You have to get 32 two point caps for each jersey. Do the math. Okay, okay. I actually got a cap that says �You win a free jersey�, so I�ve really only downed enough for two jerseys. 64 sodas, most 24oz. 1, 536 ounces of Mt. Dew in, like, 6 weeks.

That�s just sick.

I�m not even going to figure calories and such. I�d have to kill myself.

I bought some more books for my child. No, I don�t have one. And, at the rate I�m going......Anyway, I just bought a bunch of �classics�. Jane Eyre, Wuthering Heights, etc. Yes I realize those are a little advanced but, once I actually have a child, I plan on keeping her around for a while. Also, I know I�ll get tired of reading �The Pokey Little Puppy� to her.

::pause for everyone to fondly remember �The Pokey Little Puppy�::

I have blue hair. I normally have black hair (or as close as caucasianly possible). I recently added some nice auburn highlights. Ooohs and aaahs appreciated. For Christmas, I received one of those little contraptions that braids your hair for you. Yes. I am that lazy. Had Brittany and Jesi today (6 and 3) and we did the girlie thing all day. Advice: do not let a giggly 3-year-old paint your nails. Also, 6-year-olds and mascara wands. Not a good combo. So we nipped that little adventure in the bud.

Anyway, Brittany put 8 braids in my hair and we found my old hair paint. [sarcasm] Still good! Boy, I�m glad! [/sarcasm] The girls insisted on painting each braid blue. Electric blue. It does look fairly cool. I�m still washing it out.

Mr. Nastylittletrollman. I hate him. He was actually flirting with one of the girls in my class this morning. Ew. Dude. He�s like 70. And he�s a nasty, little troll.

It was Composition, so he couldn�t belittle my Dickinson interpretations. Our essay due today was a comparison/contrast essay. Mr. Nastylittletrollman read and graded them during class. I wrote and compared Henry David Thoreau and Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Because this is college.

There were eight, I repeat--8, essays comparing cats and dogs. The gal next to me opened her paper thusly �I have a dog. He is white. I have two cats. They are fluffy.�

Because this is college.

Last five minutes of class, the papers are handed back. I get a �B� and a �low B� because �at this level� my subject, as well as the �tone� of my writing is �pretentious�.

Okay. So, for writing well and actually thinking about my subject, I can be arbitrarily penalized by a substitute? Yeah, I just love community college in Iowa.

Oh, and Miss Fluffy Cats? �A-� for it�s �simplistic� and �candid depiction� of several �well-known truths�.

May I please kill him? I�m skipping class. If he�s there, Eibisch is not. I�ve met a lot of jackasses in my life, but I don�t normally pay them to teach me.

Huh. My neighbor guy? That revs his harley at ungodly hours? That has lived across the street for 13 years? I just noticed that he�s a cop.

Hi. I�m oblivious.

Really, I am. My mom made me a huge quilt in our front room. I went by it on a daily basis. Never noticed. Mom and Bootsie decided to have a Halloween party--brought in all the decorations and food and stuff. Never noticed. Halloween evening, people kept coming over. I didn�t realize it was a party until 7pm--2 hours after people started arriving.

I am totally oblivious. Which might be a good thing when it comes to sneaking Christmas presents by me. Don�t bother with subterfuge. Just walk in the door, packages rustling to wake the dead and say �Yoo-hoo, Eibisch! Got your Christmas presents right here! Look over here! Presents! Right! Here! For you!� I won�t have a clue.

My brother has a new little weird habit. He goes outside to play basketball or football or soccer or ride his bike. The second he gets outside, he takes off his shoes. Runs all over with no shoes. But he leaves his socks on. I don�t get it.

Currently Reading:
The Dante Club by Matthew Pearl

Listening To: Red Letter Days--The Wallflowers

~*~

Have a happy day!

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