Before you know it, you're the crazy cat lady in the scary house

T.G.I.S.!

June 22, 2002 ... 11:18 a.m.

T.G.I.S.! (Thank goodness it�s Saturday!)

I know, I know--you were going to call the Cedar Rapids Police to do a welfare check on me. Except that you realized that you don�t know my real name.

Or where I live.

So you didn�t call.

But that�s okay because our police force is like a better looking bunch of Keystone Cops. Seriously. Even my good pal, Officer Jim (who is a police officer--didn�t see that coming, did you?), jokes about it. They can�t solve a bank robbery to save their lives and can only solve a murder if the killer left a bloody trail of footprints to their own home ( I�m very serious--a high school friend of Bootsie�s was murdered and the SOB left a bloody trail of footprints to his apartment). My old van was broken into, windows smashed, stereo ripped out and I called the police. They did not even come out to look. They said, and I quote, �Okay. You can turn it into your insurance now.� Gee. Thanks. Hope you didn�t break a sweat there, Officer Friendly.

I�m going to see Lilo & Stitch this afternoon. Yay! The soundtrack has a ton of Elvis! Yay! Then we�re going out to eat at a place that has amazing cheesecake. Yay! I�m taking Le Prince so I don�t have another dork debacle. Speaking of VeggieTales...I got the �Ultimate Silly Songs� and �Larry Boy and the Fib from Outer Space.� I went to the Christian bookstore and the same lady was there and we chatted about Russia and adoption, etc. She asked if he liked VeggieTales as I put the videos on the counter. He�d never seen them, and not wanting to lie but not really wanting to tell the truth, I said �I�m a little old for them, don�t ya think? Ha. Ha.� She laughed, too. Then she showed Le Prince a Bob the Tomato figure and he said �No. Thank you. No hungry.�

B.U.S.T.E.D.!

I�ve gotta find another Christian bookstore.

So I skulked back to the car. On our way home, Le Prince decided to treat me to his rendition of �Do Wah Diddy.� He wasn�t too bad. He could only sing along with the �do wah diddy diddy dum diddy do� and the echoed (�she�s mine...she�s mine�) parts. And the rest of the song, he would insert random English words to the tune. �Toilet,� �computer� and �dork� were fairly common lyrics.

Bootsie moved my weight bench to the deck. So that I can work out...AND get a tan. Yeah, that�ll happen. Friends, I look a bit like Snow White. I have near-black hair and very, very, very pale skin. I have to put on like SPF 75 to walk out to the mailbox or...*poof*...I�m a cinder.

Well, Cousin #1�s girlfriend was supposed to have an ultrasound yesterday, but I haven�t heard. He has a daughter, she has a son and daughter. He obsessively wants a son. So obsessively that he won�t even consider that it might be another girl. Not a consideration.

I�m going to go now. Lilo & Stitch, Elvis and cheesecake! Could this day be more fun? Only if Jon Seda was thrown in the mix.

~*~

Have a happy day!

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