Before you know it, you're the crazy cat lady in the scary house

It's Snowing ... And I Feel Fine

March 16, 2004 ... 5:23 p.m.

[at a lecture on the Titanic]
Speaker: �And, for many of the immigrants, it was the last view of home before a new adventure in America.�
Bootsie:*loudly* �Or, you know, a watery grave.�

Ahh... There�s what? 5 days until Spring? Yeah. And we have 6 inches of snow.

Damn you, Girls State Basketball Tournament! It never fails! Every year, on the weekend of the tournament, it snows. Every year!

The forecasters were all �Maybe an inch, no accumulation, no sticking ...�

LIARS!

I trusted the weathermen. They�re very trustworthy fellows. Now, they just suck. Weathermen suck. And they�re just lying sacks of goatcheese. And they lie. And why do we need them? We have windows--we can figure it out, you know. Couldn�t do any worse than them.

Hey, Sioux City! The weathermen say expect 1 to 2 inches! Hey, Sioux City! What did you get? Hmm? Come on ... 1 inch? 2 inches? More, you say? 6 inches? 7 inches? Still more? Jeez ... a foot of snow? MORE? 18 INCHES?!!? Forecaster looking for a new job yet? Probably not. Most likely he hasn�t got his front door shoveled out yet.

And were I a forecaster, I would�ve looked out my window and reported something akin to �Sioux City, hope you�ve got bread and milk �cause there�s a buttload of snow coming your way.�

But this is actually my favorite week of the year. Snow or not. March Madness, baby! The NCAA Tournament starts Thursday. 32/33 basketball games by Sunday. YAY! And the National Invitation Tournament is today. The NIT is postseason play, but it is definitely regarded as a lamer tournament.

But, with Captain Gel at the helm of rapidly sinking SS UIowa Basketball Program, it�s the best we can do.

We play St. Louis tonight at 6:05 (CST) on ESPN2 (ch. 144 on Dish Network). Perhaps you would like to see the wunderkind in action? Hey--he steps it up for national television! Perhaps you would like to see why I call him �Captain Gel�? Check out the hair. It hasn�t moved since 1984. Well, you know, except for the off season plugs. Perhaps you would like to check out the junior section hottie? #44--he�ll jump the tip. He is, I kid you not, a shorter doppleganger of Oscar. BTW, #30 is also pretty easy on the eyes, but I don�t think the camera does him justice.

GO HAWKEYES!!!!

I am really happy today and I don�t know why. I feel like a weight is off my shoulders when I hadn�t realized it was there in the first place. I keep looking over my right shoulder, through our living room picture window. It is large and bare, because the new drapes aren�t up because we had to take off the trim because the idiots who built this house did not put any insulation around the windows--and they are COLD!!

Anyway, all I see are houses, snow, gray skies and almost-bare trees. The trees in our yard have buds that look red (I haven�t gotten a close look). I hope the leaves are red. The trees are maple, but I don�t know that I�ve ever been up close and personal with a maple tree. I haven�t taken notice if I have.

I hope they�re red, because I like color. When it comes to flora, my mom prefers hostas, mothers-in-law tongues, cactus ... mostly non-bloomers and green plants. I get to have a big flower garden this year. I do heirloom gardening and have some roses to plant. But I also want some daisies and daffodils and carnations and several others. I also ordered an orange rose. I�m not sure about the color, but I am over most of the yellow flowers now.

I am a little wary of feeling happy like this because it usually precedes something pretty crappy. My next gi appointment is next Wednesday, too. I am just going to be happy and revel in this feeling and next Wednesday I am sure everything will be fine.

In the meantime, I will just plan my garden, finish my baby quilt (only 2 more squares! I know, I know--baby quilt?? One of my cousins is bound to have another one sooner or later) and start redoing my old toybox. Maybe.

Note to Mother Nature:

Look, lady--you are really getting on my nerves with this snow crap. Save it. Send it to Texas. Just knock it off. It�s almost spring--take a break, you crazy old biddy.

Tiredly,
Eibisch.

Note to Kirsten Dunst:

I saw Mona Lisa Smile. I�ve only liked you in ... nothing. And that hasn�t changed.

Sincerely,
Eibisch
P.S. You have weird hands.

Note to You-know-who-you-are,

So sorry, but next time you want to play? Bring your �A� game.

Bemusedly,
Eibisch

Note to Captain Gel,

You are a bad coach. Horrible. Awful. Dreadful. Terrible. And the way you constantly blame one or two players for a loss is appalling. Blaming losses on �bad luck� has also grown tiresome. Five years of bad luck? Sure? Five years of declining ticket sales, of unnecessary injuries, of �lack of leadership�, of guys �not listening�, of guys not �buying into the system� (a system which nobody, least of all you, seems to get. Near as I can figure, it is some sort of bastardized �Princeton Offense�), of guys transferring or quitting ... let�s call a spade a spade here, Steve. The ONE thing all five of these seasons have in common is YOU.

You do realize you are jeopardizing your coaching future by staying? For the love of the NCAA, man! Resign! Trade jobs with Steve Lavin!

Resigned,
Eibisch

Note to Allen Iverson:

You are shit.

Disgusted,
Eibisch.

Currently Reading: In His Image (Book One of the Christ Clone Trilogy) by James BeauSeigneur

Listening To: downloads
...I am hanging on every word you say, even if you don�t want to speak tonight...

Have a happy day!

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