Before you know it, you're the crazy cat lady in the scary house

Christmas. Dinner. Family.

December 22, 2002 ... 9:40 p.m.

Christmas. Dinner. Family.

Mom (in her bedroom):�What time is it ?�
Eibisch (other side of house): *squeaks* �1:35 *coughhackcough*�
Mom: �Eibisch! What time is it?�
Eibisch: �*squeaks slightly louder* 1 *coughcough* 1:35�
Mom (stomping out to me): �Dammit, Eibisch! Are you deaf? I asked you what time it was!�
Eibisch: �I *coughcough* said *hack*, 1:35.�
Mom: �Oh, that�s right. You�re mute. You shouldn�t talk, you�ll strain it more.�
-15 minutes later-
Mom (back on other side of house): �Eibisch, what time is it?�

Mom put some gifts under the tree today. Some Harry Potter gift wrap. Some Spider man gift wrap. And for Bootsie...several gifts in Elvis Presley gift bags. You read that right. Bootsie. I mean, what the crap? Elvis. Bootsie. ??? Bootsie gets Elvis?

That�s just wrong.

So wrong.

So, so wrong.

I cannot begin convey to you the sense of wrongness hovering about our Christmas tree.

Christmas. Dinner. Family.

No one ate. Which is supremely weird. You just don�t understand. My family eats. I mean, they EAT. And we have, somehow, more food than when we started. Maybe they were stymied by the absence of my normal, and constant, beforeduringafter dinner chatter. My grandparents brought fudge. Aw, I loooove my grandparents. I didn�t get any though. Man, you gotta move fast when there�s chocolate in the house. I was watching my mom closely. The best defense is a good offense, right? Well it would�ve been...HAD I BEEN WATCHING THE RIGHT PERSON!!!
Le Prince, it seems, has developed quite a fondness for fudge. 23 pieces. He ate 23 pieces. And no one--NO ONE--noticed until my sister said �Hey, where�s the fudge?� And Le Prince proudly piped up �I eated them all! Ha ha!�

Cousin#5 came and announced that she and her fianc� had broken off their engagement. You have no idea how hard it was not burst into laughter. I mean, what does this one make? 17, 18? Honestly, somewhere around 6. I�m just going to stop counting. And worse than that--she had cut her hair in my second choice hairstyle. Nuts. Now I have to keep my hair long for a while so as not to be a copycat. Oh, and then she gives Mom a family photo. Cousin#3? My first choice haircut. Mm-hmm.

Stupid fashion-plate cousins.

I had one little piece of ham and just ate those cream cheese pickle things all night. I really like those. I didn�t even have any pie. Which may be the reason my grandma is now convinced that I'm pregnant (um, no). That or I have whooping cough and am going to keel over dead before I see the doctor. It's a cold, Grams! But, hey, I'll have him check for polio while I'm there, too.

TheCuteBaby? So, so, SO cute! And she�s getting a little sister in March. They plan to name her Abigail and call her Abby. In fact, they were calling her that already.

What else? Oh. �Santa� came and brought presents for all the younguns. Le Prince was excited. I think this will be his only �believing� Christmas. I have mixed feelings about the whole Santa thing. I don�t want to lie to my kids and then crush their little dreams but, at the same time, kids grow up so fast anymore that I�m not sure what harm would come from believing in a little magic for a few years. I was upset when I was told the truth. I don�t have a complex, but I was upset. More so by the way I was told. At lunch in first grade, a little girl who was a Jehova�s Witness informed me. And it wasn�t like she was just telling a truth, she did it out of spite (she was a mean little girl anyway). Maybe if my mom had told me because I was �old enough� to knowunderstand.

Eh. I�ve got time to figure it out.

Currently Reading:
The Nanny Diaries by Emma McLaughlin and Nicola Kraus

Listening To:
The Kickovers, AM Radio, Weezer, Jimmy Eat World...and whoever else is in the mix

~*~

Have a happy day!

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