Before you know it, you're the crazy cat lady in the scary house

Stalling

April 12, 2003 ... 7:57 p.m.

Stalling

[as the Naked Cowboy walks onstage during CMT’s Flameworthy Music Awards]
Le Prince: “Oh my holy God!”

Cousin#3 stopped by today. To talk to Mom about our grandparents’ house. She and her husband are buying it. She is such a copycat. I have always said I was going to buy their house. I’m not because of my whole unemployment thing. Also, it would mean staying in Iowa. Okay so that is like, you know, whatever. (Once again, the eloquence of Eibisch dazzles.) But a couple of months ago I mentioned, at a family dinner, that I was thinking of getting my hair cut. The next time I see her, she has my haircut. A couple of weeks ago, she asked my grandpa if she could have his collection of leprechaun music boxes (they’re empty Jim Beam collectible decanters). Whoa, Nelly. First of all--beat you to them, Gramps gave them to me for my birthday. Boo-YA! Secondly--everybody, and I mean EVERYBODY, in our family knows I called dibs on those when I was in Kindergarten.

I understand that I am in the unenviable position of having the ground upon which I tread worshipped incessantly, but enough is enough. I bless her with my presence on a semi-regular basis, what more does she need? Geez, there is only so much essence du Eibisch to go around. Quit Bogarting the Eibisch, Cousin#3!

Okay, so I jest. But, I swear--if I see her with electric blue streaks in her hair....heads will roll, people. Heads. Rolling. I’m just saying...

And, yes I did wash the blue out last week, but then I put stripes in again. I like it.

I’m...what?...4, 5 days into the vegetarian thing and it’s actually pretty cool. Nobody else has really noticed, although Mom remarked that the bologna was not going as quickly as usual but the peanut butter is! Hmm. I really thought I’d miss meat, but I don’t. Of course, it’s only been less than a week. I’m really going to feel it come family reunion time. Oy. The Swedish meatballs, the cold fried chicken, the deer sausage. I love deer sausage. And my uncle puts extra-sharp cheddar cheese chunks in it. It’s soooo gooooood. But I shall persevere! I’ll just have a...carrot. Or something.

Friday Five, posted on Saturday

1. What was the first band you saw in concert?
The Monkees. Yes, that’s right. “Daydream Believer” style! “Last Train to Clarksville”, baby! Yeah!

2. Who is your favorite artist/band now?
Say it with me...ELVIS PRESLEY!!! The king, baby, the KING!!

3. What's your favorite song?
Okay, for me, music exists on two levels--ELVIS and non Elvis. Even my not-so-favorite Elvis songs are in the ELVIS echelon and are, therefore, immensely preferred to any tune outside this realm. In the ELVIS stratosphere is “Don’t”. On the mere mortal plain of non Elvis is “At Last”--sung by Etta James.

4. If you could play any instrument, what would it be?
The piano. I can plink out some tunes, but I can’t really play. You want to hear “Sunshine Of Your Love” on piano, you come see me.

5. If you could meet any musical icon (past or present), who would it be and why?
Hmm...let me think...golly gee...maybe...could it be...yes...why it’s...
ELVIS PRESLEY!!!

Currently Reading:
Unnatural Death: Confessions of a Medical Examiner by Michael M. Baden

Listening To: Pinkerton by Weezer
...Maybe we could even get together, maybe you could break my heart next summer...
Perhaps I should question why I seem to identify with "Why Bother?" so much. Eh.

~*~

Have a happy day!

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